Friday, January 6, 2012

It's been a while...Part 2, the CALL!

Friday, December 23rd, 2011

Friday I had to work until noon. I didn't mind.
My office was quiet and I made lists of things to get done before my sister and her family, along with my little brother, were to make their way into town from San Antonio that night. I was exciting to see them for Christmas and I knew it was going to be a very full weekend!

I emailed with our caseworker a few times. She mentioned that there was a birthmom in North Carolina that they would be presenting us to. I knew not to get too excited. #1, it was Friday...#2 it was the Friday of Christmas weekend and #3 I knew that they would have to overnight our profile and that was already putting us at Tuesday.

I decided that I wasn't going to get sad or upset that my BOLD prayers were not going to be answered yet again. I thought about my new BOLD prayer and what that would be. Maybe I would pray to know something in the next month, or two.....or three.
I just knew that I couldn't focus on that. I needed to focus on the excitement of Christmas and of Jesus' birth..and of all my family being together. I knew I had to "let go" of the BOLD prayer I had prayed for so long.

I was oddly okay.

I left work at noon and hurried around to get things done.
That evening we went to my Dad's to greet my sister and her family and my little brother. We ate, played with the kids and enjoyed being together. Lots of laughter....lots of playing....

Around 7pm we got in the car to go home.
I did my usual check of my phone.

I had an email.... from my caseworker..... that said "URGENT" in the subject. My heart skipped a beat.
I opened the email and read that my caseworker needed me to call her on her cell, asap.

I was getting more and more excited. Clint was his usual calm, together self. :)

I called her.....and she said, "I have some exciting news for you guys. You were MATCHED with the birthmom from North Carolina".

I think I peed my pants a little.

We were so excited. I couldn't stop squealing and laughing and carrying on. I'm sure our caseworker thought I was coo-coo.
She gave us all the details and I scrambled around to take some notes.
She said that our baby is due via c-section on the 23rd (since then, it's been moved to the 30th) of January!!
Seriously, I had a permanent smile on my face and so did Clint.

and just like that..... MY BOLD PRAYER WAS ANSWERED!
God waited until December 23rd, at 7pm.... Just 2 days before Christmas! He knew I would grow so much in those last few days. He knew that my faith would be tested and that I would grow in my walk with Him.

We were so excited to be able to call family and close friends and share this awesome story.

It was great to have my family in town. To be able to celebrate with them, face-to-face!

Christmas was filled with so much joy and thankfulness. It was such a testimony to God's faithfulness. We were just so amazed by His love for us.

Since Christmas we have been in overdrive! Clint has worked SO hard on the nursery and it looks awesome! We have the paint done and now just wait for the carpet to come in.

I have done a little sewing too. Since we don't know the gender, I have been a little limited on my fabric choices.... but that's ok! Lots of cute polka-dots!!!
Ive made seat belt strap covers... and paci clips.
My sister bought us a Boppy while she was here, so I sewed a few covers for it!
Penny helped me put together the bassinet. Then I tested it out on her. hee hee.

I have been making a lot of travel lists! We plan to drive to NC, leaving on the 28th. We will probably be there a week (or more). Depending on court and our attorney.
Just praying things go smooth.

We can't wait to share more pictures of the nursery and preparation!

And of course, pictures of our sweet gift from above!
Lyla Rose or Oliver Robinson!

God is Good!

Thursday, January 5, 2012

It's been a while.....Part 1

I know, it has been like 2 months since I last posted. Partly because I didn't know what to say and partly because I was afraid to say it. Silly? Yes.

Back in November we were given some updated wait times for the Congo. We were now being told that the wait from referral (remember, we still didn't have a referral and were at #5 for a month) until travel was looking more like 12months or longer! That's a whole year AFTER seeing your precious babies faces until you go pick them up. We were sad about the news and felt that waiting another year (or more) wasn't for our family.
After talking with our agency (more than once) about their domestic program, and learning that there is a great need for families who are open to adopt outside their race.... we knew this was it.

After some paperwork updates and a little shuffle...we were now in the domestic program with One World.
We were happy to stay with our same agency because we really liked working with them and I felt comfortable and confident in the service they had already provided to us.

We had to make a family profile (talk about intimidating) and write a birthmom letter (even more intimidating) and then wait.....
and pray.....
and wait some more.

Many times I have talked about BOLD prayer on my blog. BOLDLY believing that God will move mountains in our favor. BOLDLY believing that this is EXactly what God wants for our family. BOLDLY believing that we will have a baby by adoption and that we will also have an amazing testimony to what God has done for us.
Many times I have stepped out in faith and said, "ok, I am BOLDLY praying that we receive our referral by the end of September." or "Ok, I know September wasn't in God's i'm BOLDLY stepping out in faith and saying October."
I never gave up on my BOLD praying. Even when they weren't answered. I had FAITH that this is what God wants for us.
Many times I sat in tears and felt the devil trying to get me down. He tried to tell us that maybe adoption wasn't what God wanted. Maybe you aren't even supposed to be a Mom at all. The devil tried, and tried, and tried. Sometimes I had weak moments and would "give in" to the pity party and think that this was never going to happen. Thankfully I have amazing sisters in Christ that stood by me and lifted me up....and reminded me of God's amazing faithfulness and love for me and for Clint.
So..... my BOLD prayer became that I would know "who" my baby is by Christmas. Either I would see their faces (Congo) or I would know something about a potential match with a birthmom. Just SOMETHING.

My faith stayed strong... through every "dangling carrot" moment, through each birthmom rejection....I had faith in God. Faith that he has known since the beginning of time...who my baby is and how we would become a family.
My anthem became the song, "God is Able" by Hillsong (i listen to it as I type this now). The words spoke straight to my heart...

"God is ABLE, He will never fail.
Greater than all we see,
Greater than all we ask...
He has done great things.

Lifted up, He defeated the grave.
Raised to Life...Our God is Able!
In His name, we overcome... for the Lord, our God, is Able"

That song was on constant repeat on my ipod. I had it on in my car, in my office...everywhere I could. I knew God was able... I knew He would never fail us.
So I continued to BOLDLY pray....."Lord, please, by Christmas"...

On Thursday night (December 22nd) we went to the Christmas service at church ( There weren't many people (because our church does a bunch of services for Christmas)... so we were able to sit up close. Next to our friends, Jeff and Kerri....and right up close to the band.
I felt like the wind was starting to die down in my I was moving closer and closer to Christmas, and further and further from my BOLD prayer.
God knew this.....
The last song we sang before sitting down was, "God is Able". I looked at my friend Kerri with tears in my eyes and said, "I love this song".

While I sang, I felt like God was renewing my hope. As tears rolled down my cheek, I felt like it was my cry out to the Lord.
"Lord, I KNOW you are able.....I KNOW you are ALMIGHTY God....."

The song ended and I wiped my tears away.

The next day was Friday, December 23rd....
(to be continued....)